Most of you know that I’m out in the job market. 2.5 good years with my most recent employer ended only after a long drawn out bankruptcy and capital restructuring effort. As with all experiences, I am thankful for my time there – learned a lot along the way. As I contemplate my next move – a task I’m taking quite seriously – I’ve begun to inventory those things that would bring meaning to any new role I pursue. This seems to be an important exercise. And here’s what I have so far. I want a job where:
- I can say whatever to whomever whenever;
- I am allowed to take one or two “do-overs” a week without penalty (I’m tired of learning from mistakes and would just as soon erase them);
- I avoid ever having to be on a conference call that lasts more than 15 minutes;
- my boss sits down with me for 1/2 hour every month just to talk about ME and MY performance…without being asked to do so;
- I spend more time hanging out with people than I do sitting in front of a computer;
- I am less experienced than most every one in the room;
- paid sabbaticals are required from time to time;
- people care about their physical, mental, and spiritual health;
- there are no “sacred cows”;
- I can challenge the status quo without fear of my political demise;
- titles and reporting structures mean less than what you actually bring to the table; and who’s at the table has less to do with what your title is or who you report to;
- one is permitted to use a cricket bat to whack egregious jerks on their heads;
- I get to work in the great outdoors from time to time;
- I travel enough to get a break but not so much that I miss out at home;
- people are better at fixing the problems than they are talking about them;
- one can get a cold beer from the soda (pop) machine;
- backstabbing, drama, gossiping, and immaturity are terminable offenses;
- I get to work with people outside of the US often;
- people smile and say good morning and genuinely care about what’s going on in your life;
- most people are there because they want to be, not because they have to be;
- most people don’t look like I do or come from the same place as I do;
- forms, policies, procedures, and protocols are there only as they absolutely and positively have to be;
- the base compensation is fair and reasonable, yet making a ton of money for extraordinary contributions is not an impossibility;
- retention is an outcome, not a program;
- we laugh and laugh and laugh and laugh…
This list will continue to grow – of that I am sure. But even as it stands, I really don’t think I’m asking for that much.
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