The Stupid Things We Say in the Workplace

Sometimes I wish someone could follow me around with a digital camcorder all day – or put me on hidden camera.  I bet I’d be shocked at some of the things I say.  I’ve been in corporate America long enough that my lexicon is laced with business references that would elicit no more than a head scratch or an eye roll from normal people.  The worst is when some of those references creep out at home and my wife just gives me that stare.  These are the things I’m going to try to say less in 2010:

  1. Post Haste: As in, “this needs to be done post haste.”
  2. Next Level: As in, “let’s take this to the next level.”
  3. Same Page: As in, “I want to make sure we’re all on the same page here.”
  4. Proactive/Reactive: As in, “Please address this proactively, not reactively.”
  5. Shoot Me: As in, “Just shoot me an Email.”
  6. Fall through the Cracks: As in, “I think this fell through the cracks.”
  7. Per: As in, “Per our conversation…”
  8. Radar Screen: As in, “I wanted to make sure this was on your radar screen.”
  9. Parking Lot: As in, “Let’s put that in the parking lot and we’ll come back to it.”
  10. At the End of the Day: As in, “This doesn’t really matter at the end of the day.”
  11. 30,000 Feet: As in, “This is a general discussion so let’s keep it at 30,000 feet.”
  12. In the weeds: As in, “I’m in the weeds right now and need to dig myself out before I have time for you.”
  13. Elephant in the Room: As in, “Everyone is avoiding this tough discussion, but it’s an elephant in the room and can’t be ignored.”
  14. Drink the Kool-Aid: As in, “that guy is so loyal he drinks the kool-aid.”
  15. Apprise: As in, “I’ll keep you apprised.”
  16. On the Bus: As in, “We got the right people in the right seats on the bus.”  This is probably my least favorite!

Even reading through this list makes me shiver…how silly we are!  Obviously this parlance is created and evolves quite naturally.  But doesn’t it irk you sometimes?  I know there’s a lot more out there so feel free to share your least favorite business lingo with us. 

Happy New Year!

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2 Responses to The Stupid Things We Say in the Workplace
  1. karenm
    December 31, 2009 | 10:30 am

    That’s a Teaching Moment
    That person is so transparent
    Really? seriously? I mean Really?
    Gee that person is an industry influencer (is that a word?).. – gee did I mention they don’t even work in the industry!

  2. Charlie Judy
    January 11, 2010 | 9:42 am

    I love it how people elevate their peers to lofty achievements not even closely attainable in reality. There’s definitely a “teaching moment” there. Thx for the comment.

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